First things first, don’t kill me over this title, it was probably a bit harsh, but the truth of the matter is that, ladies, a man’s mind is can be very offensive to a you, i.e. in a man’s head thats what he would say, whereas a girl would put it differently, much softer. Should you choose not to understand or even begin to understand this creature (i.e. other species of homo sapiens) your relating with them will be very difficult, and let’s face it, we need each other. In no particular order, here are a few tips on how the man’s mind works, and how to affair-proof your relationship with the man you love, i.e. your best friend.  Guys, you can thank me later.

Recreational playmate

A lady who is not into her man’s world of sports, cars and/or any other thing that he does for a recreational hobby will not score as many points as the one who is. It is simple, take some time and show some sort of interest in what your man does for a hobby, be his “boy” for a weekend, enter his world and see how he will respond accordingly and enter your world.

An Attractive wife

A comedian once said that when a man introduces his girl to his boys, he is proudly showing off his “trophy”. Men are visually oriented, hence, you think that you got married/moved in and it’s all over, he is bagged and tagged? No…  the same comedian said that “a woman sees her girlfriends man, no matter how tight they are as friends, she will want THAT man” It is important to understand that out there where he has gone to work, there are other women competing for his attention because you have made him look even better.  A guy I know once said; an attractive wife will encourage him to come home early. Be that wife who looks good for her man before he finds some other eye candy to chase.

Admiration

Probably any mans weakest point is his ego. Give it a try; watch his response anytime you massage his ego. Because of the excessive testosterone wired in our system, men are extremely competitive which makes us crave admiration. @Pastor_Wa said once “In the olden days, women in the village used to dance and brag about their men, over a bonfire, even if all he had was that mud hut” see this begins a process of motivating the man to be bigger and better. And it creates a safe zone for him when he has failed, he will always run back to you for encouragement. A man’s ego is his everything, in many cases more important than sex, a woman who respects that has scored major points with her man. A woman who will fight her man in public will be dropped like a hot iron.

Domestic Support

Every man reading this post can attest to the fact that, once he wakes up in the morning, he will go to work, not because he feels like, but because he has to. He is following the silent rules of society that dictate that a man must be a provider. He will always do it well, so well that when he comes home he is completely spent, bachelors end up having a house that is more or less his lodging and not a home, whereas a husband looks forward to coming home to a foot massage, a back rub,  home-cooked meal, to sit on his “throne” and be served like a king. This is key to begin to make him feel like he is in-charge of his kingdom (house/home). In many cases, a “strong woman” for a wife may make the man feel intimidated at home and hence what he pictures as his kingdom is not his, he may end up leaving to look for another kingdom to rule…

Sex

It is a common known fact that generally men have a higher libido than women, in extremely rare cases there are some ladies with a higher libido than their husbands, (if you are that man please don’t let us know because the numerous men reading this will track you down and hurt you, lol)… Random sampling indicates that a man who is getting enough sex at home from his wife tends to stay focused at home, he doesn’t wander out to go “get some” elsewhere. There is a quote that goes, “Women give sex to get love, Men give love to get sex”. This quote is wrong, sex is not a tool that will help you keep him as a your man because he has other needs too, neither is it to be withheld when having conflict, he may just find it elsewhere.

NB: adapted from His needs, Her needs by Willard F. Jr. Harely

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